tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-88349248467513287142024-03-14T04:13:29.673-07:00Word RedemptionJoin me on my journey to understand my need to both give and receive grace one blog at a time. Emily Lassiter http://www.blogger.com/profile/09709282458155561066noreply@blogger.comBlogger15125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8834924846751328714.post-58413342936287175282017-08-15T14:33:00.000-07:002017-08-17T04:31:36.077-07:00Drawing Hope From Hate: Thoughts on Charlottesville<br />
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Meet Marvin Strombo, pictured right. In 1944, Strombo was a U.S. Marine fighting in Saipan when he took a calligraphy-covered silk flag from the pocket of a fallen enemy soldier. Allied troops frequently took these flags from the bodies of their enemies as souvenirs.<br />
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For years, that flag hung in Strombo's home in a glass-fronted gun cabinet. In 2012, through a chain of events, Strombo was connected to a non-profit organization called the Obon Society. This humanitarian group works to provide opportunities for reconciliation by helping return Japanese battlefield souvenirs, taken during WWII, to the families of fallen soldiers. With their help, Strombo learned that the flag he had taken all those years ago belonged to Yasue Sadao.<br />
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Strombo also learned that Yasue's surviving siblings had questions about how and where their brother had died. Most Japanese families never learned details of how their loved ones died or ever received their remains, enabling them to properly grieve. So Strombo did something remarkable. <br />
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At age 93, he traveled 10,000 miles to return the flag and provide answers to the family of his former enemy. This courageous act had the power to bring about reconciliation of former enemies and help a family find healing from the pain of their past. You can read this powerful story in its entirety <a href="http://www.nbc-2.com/story/36121579/wwii-veteran-returns-battlefield-flag-to-japan">here.</a><br />
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As I've processed the hate-filled and tragic events of last weekend, I've felt something odd: Hope. For the first time in a long time, I feel hopeful that we are going to get the opportunity to forge reconciliation across barriers that have been in place for decades - just as Marvin Strombo has done. It's hard to look hate in the face and not feel compelled to change it.<br />
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Please don't hear me discounting the pain and anger that many are feeling - those feelings are fully justified and right. I've surely wrestled through a lot of what others are feeling over the last 16 years as a wife to an African-American man and mother to five brown-skinned children (and in all honesty, I've probably handled it less gracefully than many of you are doing right now). <br />
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The reason I feel hopeful in the midst of this hate and tragedy is that I see Charlottesville as a turning point. It feels like we've been going back and forth for years about whether the U.S. still truly has a problem with racism. Different sides have different perspectives based on their own life experiences. <br />
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When we feel sick and don't know what's wrong, we seek a diagnosis. Last weekend felt like a diagnosis. And once you get a diagnosis you can get started with treatment. Charlottesville showed us <b>all</b> that America does indeed have a problem with racism. Now that we can all agree that there is a problem, we can begin working on creating solutions to the problem together.<br />
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Reconciliation is a difficult and courageous journey that always comes with a cost, but I think it's time to take action in order to move our country forward. We can't pass this broken legacy on to our children without at least attempting to set some things right while we're still here. Maybe we won't travel 10,000 miles like Marvin Strombo did, but it's time to start taking some steps to set some things right.<br />
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I have a lot of thoughts on solutions and strategies moving forward and I'm working on a follow-up blog post to keep this one from getting any longer. However, if you live locally, we are hoping to facilitate a few first steps this coming weekend. <br />
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My husband and I are making ourselves available to pray and continue dialogue. If you're around Saturday morning, we will be praying from 7:30-8:30 and staying around to talk from 8:30-9:30 in downtown Staunton (Location TBD). We will also be available on Sunday morning from 7:30-8:30 at Staunton Hardees (also downtown) and at 9 my husband will be speaking at Staunton Alliance Church on what the church can do practically to enact change.<br />
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I know these are only small steps, but my prayer is that this is only the beginning of lasting change in our city and beyond. Hope to see you there!Emily Lassiter http://www.blogger.com/profile/09709282458155561066noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8834924846751328714.post-76984854484242340252017-03-18T16:53:00.001-07:002017-03-19T11:09:20.299-07:00No More WIC Cheese: A call to my Christian family<div style="text-align: justify;">
I've had these song lyrics stuck in my head the last few days.<i> </i></div>
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<i> "Born sinner, the opposite of a winner. Remember when I used to eat WIC cheese for dinner.</i>" - <span style="font-weight: normal;"></span><span style="font-weight: normal;">Thi'sl</span> </div>
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Some of you may be familiar with my story or you may have read a <a href="http://elassiter.blogspot.com/2015/09/thank-you-little-girl-letter-to-my.html">previous post</a> I wrote to my oldest daughter Telijah. God allowed me to endure some difficult years that have given me a window into the struggles of some of the most disadvantaged in our communities. The song lyrics above have been stuck in my head because I, too, remember eating WIC cheese for dinner. </div>
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I've been
working through some tough emotions these last few days after learning that our current
administration made a move to cut funding for the Community Development Block Grant. This grant funds programs like WIC (supplemental nutrition for pregnant women, infants and children), Meals on
Wheels, school nutrition programs and after-school care. Hopefully you'll hear my heart and know I'm not looking to enter into
the current social media feud over politics. I am simply hoping this post might compel my Christian friends to action and perhaps serve as a way to help my friends who have never had need of programs like WIC or welfare to put a face on this issue. My face.</div>
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As a young single-mother, I fought to break free from the bondage of the welfare system. This meant working over 40 hours weekly at a job that didn't pay a living wage. It meant refusing to take a social worker's advice to quit my job and return to full public assistance when I couldn't pay my heating bill. It meant depending on help from others - like a supervisor who generously helped me pay for childcare or a friend who paid to have my car fixed when the heater core went bad in the dead of winter. It also meant taking advantage of programs like WIC to purchase healthy foods when I couldn't afford to buy any without the food stamps I once depended on. There were many nights that those WIC cheese sandwiches kept us from going to bed hungry. </div>
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I understand the need to regulate and even cut government spending and I'm fully in agreement with that. I believe our welfare system is a broken system in desperate need of reform. I also believe that poverty and aging are complex issues that can't be fixed by a government or grants. However, cutting funding to these programs would be detrimental to individuals and families in our communities who need help the most. This Block Grant serves as a safety net and without it our impoverished and elderly neighbors are left to free-fall if nothing is done in its place. </div>
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As a Christian, I don't place my hope in our government to care for the impoverished and elderly. Because of passages like Proverbs 31:8-9, Isaiah 1:17 and Luke 10:25-37, I believe followers of Jesus Christ have a call to do more than pay taxes and show up at church on Sunday. Jesus asks us to mimic what He modeled in the Incarnation by getting personally involved in the lives of others. That doesn't mean He's calling us to die, but He is calling us to get involved. Jesus calls His followers to personally sacrifice for the flourishing of others. Our pastor says this is the definition of love. </div>
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It feels as if we have come to a crossroads of sorts. If these families and individuals - who Jesus describes as our neighbors - may be left without food and vital support then perhaps this is an opportunity for us. I don't pretend to have all the answers, but I do want to encourage us to spend time in prayer asking God what He's calling each of us to do to see our neighbors flourish. Some of these neighbors will be in our churches and thankfully we can surround them with support within that family. However, others will be in our communities without the support of a church family. Who will catch them if their safety-net is removed?</div>
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Perhaps God will call you to rally around your neighbors by donating to some of these groups who will be losing their funding. Maybe He will ask you to find ways to individually support people you know who will be affected. Perhaps He will even ask you to lead the charge in your church or community. I have had the privilege of seeing our church rally around specific areas of need in our city like young families, foster care and adoption and supporting public schools. It's a beautiful thing to see the local expression of the church coming together the way God intended. </div>
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I've had the honor of a front-row seat to see a community unite in various ways to support teenage mothers and their children. I've also seen collective support across our country for ministries working to fight against human trafficking, homelessness and many other great causes. It is my prayer that in a similar manner, Christ's church in our country will come together to care for those who will find themselves in need if this Block Grant is cut. This is a great opportunity to love our neighbors. May we rise to the challenge. </div>
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<br />Emily Lassiter http://www.blogger.com/profile/09709282458155561066noreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8834924846751328714.post-71946394783172076042016-07-12T09:12:00.001-07:002016-07-13T07:58:18.334-07:00Wrestling Through Last Week: A Letter To My Friends<br />
Dear American friends,<br />
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I'm so grateful that God has allowed me the gift of a diverse group of people I call friends. I find culture and ethnicity beautiful. I love trying new foods and learning new cultural customs. I love to travel and see similarities and differences in varying geographical locations and peoples. However, because of these diverse relationships and experiences, I feel extremely torn by where we find ourselves as a nation. I wish I could gather you all together in my living room for a talk. A talk that ends like this:<br />
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Since we're not at a place where we can meet in the middle just yet, I
wrote each of you a letter. I pray you will take time to hear my heart
and then join me in working towards the middle so we can all hug and pray for concilation in the near future. This is not the legacy or reality any of us want to leave for our children. <br />
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<b>To my white friends</b>, will you please help me say that black lives do matter? #BlackLivesMatter became a hashtag and subsequently a movement because my black friends were trying to express that they didn't feel like others believed that.<br />
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They were never trying to say that other lives don't matter and it was never meant to equate to police lives don't matter. My friends just wanted to hear from us that their lives matter. And guess what? They're still waiting to hear us say it with both words and actions.<br />
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What if we told a black co-worker or neighbor how sad we felt when watching the video of a 4-year-old comforting<i> </i>her distraught mother after witnessing the shooting death of her father? What if we told them that it was heartbreaking to see another black life ended...without waiting for all the "facts" of the case?<br />
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The world around my brown-skinned friends is screaming that their lives don't have the same value or worth as ours. This is a voice they have heard for hundreds of years and its sting hasn't diminished with time. We may not ever understand what it's like to live in brown skin, but can we listen to their experiences and seek to learn from them? Can we do this without having to justify with "facts" or point out areas of brokenness in their culture?<br />
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I have seen first-hand the different treatment and limited opportunities for my friends with brown skin. I know that systemic injustice is a real thing. I see that my mere birth and cultural heritage (privileges I didn't get to choose) put me in a starting place that my friends of color have to fight to reach. THIS IS WRONG. We need to affirm that non-white lives matter equally by standing with our brothers and sisters in solidarity and by using our platforms of privilege to push for change and equality.<br />
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Dr. King said, "The time is always right to do what is right." Friends, it's time to do what is right. What would happen if, instead of arguing or defending, we simply
listened and wept? I believe healing would happen and dividing walls
would fall. Let's build bridges for change. (**If you're feeling tempted to argue any of these points, I'd refer you to a great book by Michelle Alexander called <i>The New Jim Crow</i>. If you'd like to dialogue about it, I'd love the opportunity to do so AFTER you've read that book.**)<br />
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<b>To my black friends</b>, your brown skin and culture is beautiful and your lives DO matter. I hate to do this because I know you feel exhausted, but I need to ask you for a favor. Can you be gracious with us as we figure this out? This is not another stall tactic, but a genuine request for grace. Some of us are really trying to figure out what it looks like to stand with you and we need your help with this.<br />
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Many of my white friends have expressed wanting to speak out in your support but have held back for fear of offending or hurting you further. They are also trying to navigate what it looks like to grieve Alton Sterling and Philando Castile while also grieving the police officers who were senselessly murdered in Dallas. Many of my white friends and family just don't know what it's like to be brown. Can you help us understand? Can you help me initiate meeting in the middle and would you be willing to share your stories?<br />
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I know your voice has been silenced in the past, but your stories need to be heard. I want to help with that. Can we meet to pray together and formulate plans of action as brothers and sisters of one race with different ethnic and cultural backgrounds?<br />
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I need to address one more thing. I know some of you are ready to dismiss the way of non-violence and fight for equality and justice another way. My heart breaks as I see you posting about it on social media. Please don't go this route. I know you are tired of waiting. I am too. Let's link arms and take up non-violent measures to see change come. It's the better way. I'm grateful for what having a brown husband, children and friends has taught me and I'm doing everything I can to gather people to listen to you and stand with you. Your lives matter to the God who made you in his beautiful image and they matter to me. Please know, I weep with you and I stand with you. Change is coming.<br />
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<b>To my friends in law enforcement</b>, thank you for what you do. I know you feel like you're under attack and rightfully so. I want you to know that I value the work that good police officers are doing and I'm grateful to spouses and children who sacrifice so much to support their loved ones in this line of work.<br />
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You have a difficult and often thankless job. My conversations over the last year with LEO's and wives of officers have helped me see how hard all of this is for you. I know some of you want to quit because you feel unappreciated and villainized. Please hear my sincere "thank you" and my plea to continue working to keep us safe and to bring people who harm citizens and communities to justice.<br />
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We need you for society to function and we want your help. Can we work together to build bridges in our community and to get you better resources to do your jobs well? I have seen heartwarming stories of standout officers and have met at least two in our community who have gone above and beyond to care for and fight for justice for people of color (along with all citizens). I want to commend the officers who are putting themselves in harm's way to make a difference. Please don't let the protests make you want to quit. We need good officers like you. You are the key to community engagement and healing. Let's work together to build stronger community relationships that would lead to less polarization and more unity on both sides. <br />
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<b>To my Christian friends</b>, we have work to do. We are a group of people united across cultural, ethnic and socioeconomic lines by a common faith, yet we still segregate ourselves on Sunday mornings. If unity could happen anywhere, it should be with us. We are content with being the black church and the white church when we are called to be THE church. This breaks my heart. Christ has already done the work of reconciliation between man and God and in our relationships with one another.<br />
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Why do we allow cultural preferences to divide us and refuse to walk in the finished work of Christ? Will it be hard? Yes. Will the work of concilation be messy? Of course. But it's worth it. Let's take the lead in the unifying of our nation and be the beautiful, multicultural church God made us to be. Let's do what Jesus asked of us...love our neighbors as ourselves. Can we start by meeting to pray about all of this? Prayer will be the foundation of the change we desire. Your house or mine?<br />
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I want to leave you with two great resources as you pray about your next steps. First, there is a movement that started this year called The AND Campaign. This group was founded by urban Christian leaders that are taking action similar to the #BlackLivesMatter movement but from a gospel-centered perspective. I encourage you to check them out at this link and support them with your time, talents and treasures: <a href="http://theandcampaign.com/#campaignhome">http://theandcampaign.com/#campaignhome</a>. Second, here's a video by DA Horton that would be a great starting point for our conversation and time of prayer. It would mean a lot to me if you'd take time to watch this and let me know when you want to meet to start praying: <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KIZThiaXyys">https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KIZThiaXyy. </a><br />
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<b>To all my friends</b>, "slacktivism" accomplishes nothing. Screaming at one another behind computer screens only serves to further divide us. I don't know about you, but I feel exhausted from watching the news and arguments on my social media feeds. Let's turn everything off and just love one another. We don't need a national platform to be part of change (although if you have that, I'd love to talk to you). We simply need to reach out to our neighbors who look or live differently from us and start a friendship. It's harder to stereotype when your life experiences have taught you otherwise. It's so much harder to polarize when you can put a face on an issue. Mother Teresa said, "If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other." Let's try to remember that and work to love our neighbors, especially those who are different from us, like they belong to us.<br />
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Let's start the conversation, friends, and then let's move from talking to doing. There is much work to do, but change is possible. We cannot stay where we are. I look forward to hearing from you. <br />
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Grace and peace,<br />
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EmilyEmily Lassiter http://www.blogger.com/profile/09709282458155561066noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8834924846751328714.post-91829790684127747512016-07-09T09:11:00.002-07:002016-07-09T10:05:43.126-07:00#AltonSterling, #PhilandoCastile, #Dallas: Where Do We Go From Here?<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I've been wrestling through a lot of emotions lately. I find it helpful sometimes to share those emotions with others through this blog. I've been trying to compose something for a few days, but have been having trouble. <br />
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On July 5th, I wanted to write about the value of black life - a topic I have shared about before - but it was hard to find the words to describe the feelings I felt after watching the shocking video of Alton Sterling being shot. It literally took my breath away. <br />
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On July 6th, after watching a second horrific video of a police officer shooting of a black male in front if his 4-year-old daughter and girlfriend, I wanted to write again but just couldn't put words to my emotions.<br />
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On July 7th, I watched in horror as news unfolded about the brutal murder of police officers in Dallas. Again, I had no words. Anything I could have said at those times was already being shared by people far more eloquent than me anyway.<br />
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Yesterday, as I drove home from a meeting, I passed a man standing on a corner holding a cardboard sign. It simply said "Practice non-violence." As I rolled past and read it, I couldn't figure out how to respond. I didn't feel like a thumbs-up or wave could convey my understanding and agreement. I, too, wanted the violence to stop and had been feeling like I just had to do something. But what? I was thinking about it as I drove the remaining blocks home.<br />
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As I pulled onto our street, a young African American male was walking down the sidewalk. As he walked, he was rapping along with whatever was in his earbuds with much emotion using correlating hand gestures (not an uncommon sight in our neighborhood). Then, the strangest thing happened. I felt the urge to stop my vehicle right there and get out and just give him a big hug. Now, for those of you who might be worried...I didn't do it. Not because I didn't want to, but because I thought he might think I was crazy. I'm sure that's what I would have felt if some random lady jumped out of her car and blindsided me with a hug for no reason. <br />
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As I parked and he walked on down the street, I just sat and cried. I desperately wanted that young man to know I wasn't afraid of his blackness. I wanted him to see that this white lady saw him as a young man made in God's beautiful image and not as a threat. I felt compelled to show him that white people aren't all the same and not all of us view him through a lens of fear or hatred. I wanted him to know that I, too, was grieving the loss of more precious black lives. But how could I convey that to a stranger?<br />
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I've also thought a lot about the people I know in law enforcement. I haven't always lived my life on the right side of the law. As a juvenile and young adult, I had some negative experiences with law enforcement and it has taken me years and relationships with real people to see that LEO's are people too. I know not all of them are the same and for all the officers who have racist ideas or who wield their power in an unjust way, there are many other officers who are working tirelessly to help their communities and keep people of all ethnicities and backgrounds safe. I know my old friends and many people in my neighborhood don't share this point of view, but I'm grateful for what those relationships have taught me. I want my friends in the law enforcement community to know that I am heartbroken at what happened in Dallas and what we're starting to see in other states. Their lives are also made in God's image and precious and I do appreciate the great work that so many officers risk their lives to do each day. <br />
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These relationships I've been privileged to have with people in both groups have given me a different and maybe unique perspective. It's harder for me to polarize- or separate people into stereotypical groups- because I have been gifted with real relationships with real people. So as I think about where to go from here, I want to leave you with an idea and an opportunity if you are local.<br />
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1. Relationships are the key to coming together as one. So, while I wouldn't recommend jumping out of your car to hug strangers, I would recommend engaging people different from ourselves in meaningful dialogue and friendships. Maybe it starts with an intentional warm smile or conversation with a stranger. Maybe it looks like inviting a co-worker with a different cultural background over for dinner. Maybe it looks like some of the beautiful acts of kindness I've read about in the news like the African American man giving Dallas police officers cold drinks while they worked or people who are not African American standing alongside black friends and neighbors demanding change (even if the injustice they see doesn't impact them directly). Can we each go out of our way to disarm one another with love? Can we each make it a priority to intentionally engage someone who looks or thinks differently from us? Whether we do it with a kind word or action, a listening ear or peaceful protest, can we just come together and do something?<br />
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2. If you live in our community, I have an opportunity for you to do just that. It's super short notice, but Chris and I will be at the Hardees in downtown Staunton at 9 in the morning. We are praying that some of you will make an effort to meet with us there to start this conversation. I would love to see that conversation move from Hardees to a larger venue where we can invite more people in to dialogue and find a middle ground with us. We're also inviting people to join us at our church afterward. I personally believe that the church has a message that can unite us regardless of our ethnic or cultural backgrounds and want to be part of change that begins within the church. You are invited to come and begin that process with us. <br />
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We are just two people from two culturally different backgrounds, but we (like that wonderful man with the cardboard sign) feel like we have to do something. Change happens when people are uncomfortable enough with where things are to take action to move to a different reality. I think we can at least agree that we are all hurting and grieving the unnecessary loss of precious lives in our country this week and something must change. Together, we have the power to make that happen. I hope you will join us. <br />
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<br />Emily Lassiter http://www.blogger.com/profile/09709282458155561066noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8834924846751328714.post-21575898321545834502015-09-17T11:23:00.001-07:002015-09-17T11:23:34.835-07:00Thank you, little girl: A letter to my "unplanned" childI never could have imagined as I flipped through the pages of that fetal development book how you would impact my life. I still remember the shock and fear I felt when I learned I was pregnant. Some feelings and memories don't fade with time. I also remember the determination I gained when I learned that you had a beating heart and were a living being. The advice of others to end your life fell on deaf ears after that day in the university library.<br />
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I didn't have a plan, but I knew that you were my child and I would fight for you. I didn't always get it all right, but God has carried us through. I never would have imagined myself where I am today and a lot of that change I owe to you. You changed me, little girl, and I am grateful that you did. Becoming a mother forced me to grow up and take responsibility for not only your life but my own.<br />
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Some said I was throwing away my future by dropping out of college to become a mother. It's true, my decision to keep you did cost me a college education and did change my future, but that other future was never mine anyway. Being your mom is worth far more than anything I lost in this process. This journey has taught me more than I could ever learn from a professor or book. It wasn't a loss, but a gain. <br />
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So I'm writing this on your seventeenth birthday to say thank you, sweet girl. Thank you for interrupting the life I thought I wanted, to give me the life I was made for. Our struggle not only birthed a baby but a determination that other young moms wouldn't have to walk the same road I did. God wrote you into my story to teach me that I couldn't do life on my own, but desperately needed his help. Don't ever believe for a minute that you were an accident. He planned you all along. <br />
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As I reflect on the struggles and joys, I want you to know that it was all worth it. Every struggle and every perceived loss. I don't have any regrets in my decision. You are more than I could have ever asked for and I am so proud of the woman you are becoming. I'm grateful that God pens our stories far more beautifully than we ever could. I'm enjoying watching him write yours. Love you, Mama <br />
<br />Emily Lassiter http://www.blogger.com/profile/09709282458155561066noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8834924846751328714.post-35986715099825553552014-12-12T08:36:00.002-08:002014-12-12T08:36:11.997-08:00Broken Pieces: Thoughts on suffering on the anniversary of a friend's death. A wise woman told me this week that "the broken pieces of our story is where the light shines through."<br />
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Fourteen years ago, today, my life and worldview were smashed into pieces by the tragic murder of a friend. The English language is devoid of words to describe that experience (and several other things I have faced in the years since), but this anniversary I feel prompted to share some thoughts about it.<br />
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Life is a teacher. We can choose to ignore her or to learn from her. Here are some things that life and suffering have taught me over the years:<br />
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<li><b>You will make it through.</b> In times of deep suffering and struggle in my life, I have questioned whether I was strong enough to survive. It's pretty evident by the fact that I'm writing this that I did. The reality, though, is that I<b> wasn't</b> strong enough to survive those things. God carried me through them and sent people to care for me when I was unable to care for myself. He is our strength in our times of weakness. <b></b></li>
<li><b>You are not alone. </b>One thing that has remained constant in very different scenarios of suffering in my life is the presence of God. He truly is near to the brokenhearted. I have never felt closer to Him than in times of suffering and pain. That fellowship is the thing that has carried me through experiences that no human being can comfort. </li>
<li><b>God can use your pain to help others.</b> I love John Piper's book and often used quote, "Don't waste your life." When he had cancer, he wrote another book called "Don't Waste Your Cancer." In that same line of thinking, I don't want to waste my pain. One of the beautiful things about our suffering is that God can use it as a platform from which to speak into the hearts of other hurting people. That has brought me great comfort as I look back over the painful parts of my story. God loves to use us in His work in the lives of other broken people like ourselves. Our pain doesn't have to be wasted. </li>
<li><b>Suffering is part of the sanctification process for Christians. </b>No book could ever teach me what I've learned from seasons of suffering. In the end, it has made me who I am today. As much as I didn't want to go through any of it, I know I am better for it and closer to God because of it. In many ways, it has solidified my theology. As Christians, our hearts long to be more like Jesus. As hard as it is to say, we become more like Him and know Him more intimately as we enter into suffering as He did.</li>
<li><b>Jesus came to make an end to our suffering. </b>This is something I cling to when I can't understand why God is allowing suffering in my life or the lives of people I love. A good God can't look on suffering and turn His back. We see Jesus in John 11, weeping at the death of his friend Lazarus. Jesus is the visible image of the invisible God, so we know how God responds to suffering from Jesus' response. This life passes in the blink of an eye but there is an eternity waiting where those who put their hope in Jesus' finished work on the cross can rest in the promise of Revelation 21:4. A day is coming where He will wipe every tear and make the wrong things right. </li>
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I hope this post will be an encouragement to someone who is suffering. You can make it through whatever you're facing and your suffering has a purpose. God really does use the broken pieces of our story for ourselves and for those around us. Even if you are not able to see that today, I pray He will bring you to that place. <br />
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Emily Lassiter http://www.blogger.com/profile/09709282458155561066noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8834924846751328714.post-18508328411141273792014-11-24T22:14:00.000-08:002014-11-25T05:46:02.703-08:00Tears, anger, and prayers for change: My thoughts on FergusonTonight I sit by my sweet, brown-skinned boy as he sleeps and just cry. Not one of those nice, controlled cries, but a weeping that comes from deep within your soul that you cannot describe with words. I used to try to fight my tears, but you can't hold that type of emotion inside and be healthy.<br />
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As deep as my emotions are running, I cannot imagine the type of grieving that Michael Brown's mother is doing tonight. I cannot conceive of the fact that a group of mothers are weeping in unison with her because they understand her pain. It leads my mind to Jeremiah 31:15. There is no comforting a mother in this. <br />
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Everything in me wants to wake my boy from his sleep just to tell him that he matters. I feel desperate to remind him that his skin doesn't define who he is. I want to tell him again that he is made in the image of God and has value and worth despite what is communicated to him by the world around him. I just sit and hold him and weep as I listen to him breathe. <br />
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My tears feel hot, but not hotter than my face has become, and I realize that I am angry. I want to scream at the injustice of the world we live in. I want to fight against anyone who would dare to call my boy a "thug" or "monkey" (words I have read in the media recently to describe brown-skinned boys like him). I want to yell that he wants to be a scientist or engineer, not a drug dealer. I want to rage at the thought of women clutching their purses at the sight of him. He is not a threat, he's my child. I want to make people understand that he is a human being. Just like every young man pictured above. But I can't.<br />
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I feel helpless. I know my anger won't change anything and my attempts to justify my views are futile. I pray that this post will escape the sight of those who feel the need to contend "facts" or recklessly throw out words like "race card" as if they would have an audience with me because of my white skin. Honestly, I'm all argued out and having to pray really hard not to be bitter or hateful.<br />
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I wish there were some easy answer, but if there were then change would have come already. The type of change we need isn't fueled by anger like the looting and burning in Ferguson and most of it happens outside of the view of news cameras. It begins with talks like the one that happened in my living room shortly after Michael Brown was killed. You can read more about that talk <a href="http://thecrosspromotion.blogspot.com/2014/09/ferguson-aftermath-why-pair-of-cops.html">here</a>. <br />
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I'm praying tonight that many more of those talks will be happening in the days to come - especially in the context of the church. I know I'm powerless to change things, but I can pray and do what I can to be part of the solution. If not, we'll just be back in this same place in a matter of months. And I cannot just sit here and wait for that day to come. Emily Lassiter http://www.blogger.com/profile/09709282458155561066noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8834924846751328714.post-14313613892524005512014-02-16T15:08:00.001-08:002014-02-16T15:25:35.656-08:00Wrestling through Jordan Davis and Michael Dunn:Thoughts on race in America<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><strong><em>"What is the value of a black man's life in the United States of America?"</em></strong></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">The mere question posed on a social networking site last night had me in tears. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">To people who don't have a brown-skinned husband or son, this might seem like a ridiculous question. To those of us who do, it's a very real question and one we find ourselves asking every time we hear of young men like <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/BART_Police_shooting_of_Oscar_Grant">Oscar Grant</a>, <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shooting_of_Trayvon_Martin">Trayvon Martin</a>, <a href="http://www.cnn.com/2013/09/15/justice/north-carolina-police-shooting/index.html">Jonathan Ferrell</a> and <a href="http://www.cnn.com/2014/02/15/justice/florida-loud-music-trial/index.html?hpt=hp_t1">Jordan Davis</a>. This issue makes me feel both deep grief and deep anger. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">As I sit here and think of times when my husband has been racially profiled I'm forced to consider the next inevitable questions. I have to wonder if my sweet boy will ever cause another white woman to hold her purse a little tighter. I have to think through when we'll have to have a talk with our son warning him of how to interact with law enforcement officers should they ever stop to question him. I have to wonder if I'll ever get that life-altering phone call that so many mothers of young black men in our country have received concerning their sons.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">At times it feels overwhelming and even hopeless but I refuse to let myself believe that there isn't hope. I think about the progress we've made as a country and specifically several exchanges that I've witnessed lately that lead me to believe that change is still coming. Here are three reasons I'm not feeling hopeless in light of the latest verdict:</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">1. Last year, our city held a forum on race sparked by the exoneration of George Zimmerman in the death of Trayvon Martin and the racial tensions that were illuminated by that case. This forum was both honest and peaceful. It showed that our community acknowledged that there was a problem and that citizens in our city were interested in being part of the solution. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">2. For the last few months I was able to be part of a diverse group of people who sat and talked candidly about our differences, some preconceived ideas and how the school system could help build bridges across some of those gaps to better reach kids. The group put together an event to help get information to families on what resources are available in our community to better ensure success for ALL local students. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">3. A few weeks ago, I sat across from two talented young black men from our community who made choices years ago that they are still paying for today. Also present at this table were a local pastor, businessman, and police officer - all of whom are white. I wasn't really sure what to expect walking in, but what happened around that table has really impacted me - and I think everyone else there as well. In this meeting, I got to hear white men declaring and affirming the worth and dignity of the two black men despite their past choices. I was able to watch stereotypes on both sides of the table being laid aside and men engaging one another as men. Not as black men and white men, but as men created equally in the image of God. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">I keep thinking of something our pastor often says - "the ground is level at the foot of the cross." There is no distinction made between rich and poor, white or brown skin, seemingly good or seemingly bad. In God's sight we are humanity and He is deity. No other separations exist that we don't create ourselves. The gospel is the starting place for true, lasting change. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">Culturally, Americans are learning to be more politically correct - or careful what thoughts we allow to formulate into words. But God offers another way. The gospel changes hearts and with changed hearts come changed communities and changed standards for people within those communities. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">I believe a change is coming. I just pray that change comes before we have to bury another one of our sons.</span> <br />
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<br />Emily Lassiter http://www.blogger.com/profile/09709282458155561066noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8834924846751328714.post-48626867479016812302014-01-24T15:33:00.002-08:002014-01-25T09:34:49.789-08:00Those days when the tears won't stop: 4 thoughts on pain <span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Last week I had another one of those days when the tears just wouldn't stop. I'm pretty sure if you've lived any time at all in this broken world (and especially if you are involved in outreach ministry) you can relate to that feeling. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Those days have become more frequent the more I'm allowed the privilege of stepping into the lives of others. Over the last two years, I've heard stories that cut me to my soul. Horrible stories that seem like they should be part of a movie - yet I find myself staring into the face of the person who has or is currently living that nightmare. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Some days I wonder why God thinks I can handle so much. The pain and struggles of my own life are, at times, enough to push me to the edge - yet God keeps allowing me to see a pain and hopelessness deeper and more urgent than my own. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Last week, I sat and listened as a precious young mother of 6 shared how she was struggling with deplorable living conditions while being exploited by a slumlord. Over the last year, I've heard stories of human trafficking, childhood rape and women forced to barter with the only resource they had left - their bodies (just to name a few). </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">As much as I used to pride myself on being "tough" or "hard," I'm at a place in life where I often find myself weeping. Sometimes it's because there is no other way to express my anger over injustice and the feelings that come when I hear stories of suffering and vulnerability. Sometimes it's because I feel frustration at my inadequacy to help and inability to "fix" things. Either way, all I can do is weep. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Sometimes pain is a teacher. Here are 4 things I've learned in the times when the tears won't stop:</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><b> 1. Someone always has it worse than me.</b> Sometimes I wonder if this is God's way of gently reminding me that the
mountains in my life are mere ant hills in the grand scheme of things. It's so easy to freak out over small things in life without a clear perspective. Walking with others has been a great reminder of what a self-absorbed whiner I am. It's hard to feel sorry for yourself when confronted with the harsh realities and abuses that others face. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><b>2. I'm not the answer. </b>Ministry has been a great reminder of my limited ability to bring about change in the lives of others. Something in me just wants to make it all better, but I'm learning that I can't just fix what's wrong - in my own life and in the lives of others. There is only one who is capable of bringing about change and it's not me. Suffering (both ours and that of others) is a beautiful arrow that points us back to the all-sufficiency of God in our weakness. </span><span style="font-size: small;"><br /></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><b>3. Prayer is essential. </b>When the pain cuts so deep that I can barely formulate words to pray, that's when I need to pray most. I keep returning to this quote from Bethany H. Hoang that speaks volumes to where I've been these last two years - <i>"When our hearts are so heavily taxed that we feel we can no longer
truly pray, God leads us back to himself by telling us simply this: Pour
out your heart; pour out your heart before me." </i>There will be times when our hearts are crushed under the weight of the brokenness we see and feel, but those are the times that we need to run with reckless abandon to pour our hearts out before God. He sees and knows and has the power to bring change. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><b>4. What I see and hear isn't the end of the story.</b> I love in Genesis 3 where God declares a plan of rescue and redemption after the most hopeless and broken story of all time. I always get overwhelmed when I look at a seemingly hopeless situation without factoring in the gospel and the hope of heaven. One of my favorite Bible verses and one I run to in times of suffering is Revelation 21:4-5. When the pain of this life feels like more than we can bear, we can trust that a day is coming where God will wipe away our tears and set all the wrong things right if we will make him our life's greatest treasure. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">I'd love to hear your thoughts on this post and how you find hope when the tears won't stop. </span><span style="font-size: small;"><br /></span></span><br />
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Emily Lassiter http://www.blogger.com/profile/09709282458155561066noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8834924846751328714.post-57620589171035281072014-01-20T13:40:00.001-08:002014-01-29T14:58:50.642-08:00Why Everyone In Your Church Looks Like You: 4 thoughts on MLK's Letter From A Birmingham Jail <span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">Today, as I sought to honor and remember Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., I thought a lot about his dream. I reflected on how far our country has come and how far we still have to go. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"></span><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg0q6gMCTqIuaZ554zQY0DJDaYSlB1w0We0FWuChScvAzSa1p4K4KXQzZkRawu_NJS75iuQFvjdYQH3UBk5zHqXrI2RFMNx1UGszHCtGTnT5_KTB8DhNX24egB_10qLwJdLroZJFnHqi4g/s1600/Martin-Luther-King-Jr-.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg0q6gMCTqIuaZ554zQY0DJDaYSlB1w0We0FWuChScvAzSa1p4K4KXQzZkRawu_NJS75iuQFvjdYQH3UBk5zHqXrI2RFMNx1UGszHCtGTnT5_KTB8DhNX24egB_10qLwJdLroZJFnHqi4g/s1600/Martin-Luther-King-Jr-.jpg" height="400" width="400" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">One particular area of the civil rights struggle is still unrealized. That area is unity in the church. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">Dr. King once said <i>"It is appalling that the most segregated hour of Christian America is eleven o'clock on Sunday morning."</i> Yet, 46 years after King's death, eleven o'clock remains the most segregated hour in our nation. We're willing to interact cross-culturally at jobs and recreational events like sports leagues but are still unwilling to meet in the middle as we worship on Sunday mornings.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">We have seen glimmers of hope in churches like <a href="http://www.fellowshipmemphis.org/">Fellowship Memphis</a> - a church planted in the place where King's life ended with a focus on promoting racial unity through multi-racial leadership and gospel-centered teaching. But in the average church, Sunday morning remains dominated by single cultures. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">Lifeway research released a study this week that showed that while more than 85% of Protestant pastors say they want racial unity in their church, 86% say their church is made up of predominately one racial or ethnic group. You can read more of the study <a href="http://www.lifewayresearch.com/2014/01/17/research-racial-diversity-at-church-more-dream-than-reality/">here</a>.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">As I thought of the divisions in the church, I thought about King's letter from the Birmingham Jail. This letter was his response to the letter <i>A Call for Unity</i> written by eight white clergymen as an editorial in a local newspaper calling for an end to non-violent protests. In the letter, the pastors and religious leaders questioned the need for civil rights leaders to stir up racial tensions and called for unity by waiting quietly for the government to bring about justice. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">The video below shares the content of both letters along with video footage from the civil rights movement. I recommend taking the time to watch it today as we celebrate and reflect on the life and sacrifices of Dr. King and all those who fought for racial justice in our nation. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">As I listened to both letters and thought about the present need for change, these four things stuck out to me. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">1. Both sides were so distant that they had to communicate through an editorial letter. Are we still in that place today? Do we go out of our way to connect with our brothers and sisters in the faith outside of our cultural context? Do we really acknowledge that Jesus' death on the cross not only bought reconciliation vertically but also horizontally? The gospel changes the way we relate to God, but it also changes the way we relate to one another. If we believe the gospel then that belief should be evident when you walk into our churches and into our homes or lives outside of church walls. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">2.The willingness to try to understand what's foreign to us goes a long way in racial harmony. In his letter, King said <i>"Shallow understanding from people of good will is more frustrating than absolute misunderstanding from people of ill will. Lukewarm acceptance is much more bewildering than outright rejection."</i> I think this sums up the heart of racial division in the church. We're still only willing to offer one another shallow understanding and lukewarm acceptance. King went on to describe his experiences as a black man like this: <i>"...when you are harried by day and haunted by night by the fact that you are a Negro, living constantly at tiptoe stance, never quite knowing what to expect next, and are plagued with inner fears and outer resentments; when you are forever fighting a degenerating sense of "nobodiness"--then you will understand why we find it difficult to wait."</i> In all honesty, when reading this it sounded much like the description my husband has used in attempting to relate to me what it feels like to be a black man in America today. (If you just dismissed that as ridiculous, you probably don't have a real relationship with someone outside of your race/culture that allows them to express how they truly feel.)</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">3.Tension is needed for growth and change. It may seem easier and more comfortable to worship in a place where everything is done in a way that relates solely to our culture, but is it right? King's issue with the eight clergymen who wrote <i>A Call For Unity</i> was that they weren't willing to do what it took to see true unity realized. They were content to settle for the illusion of unity which was really only the comfort of remaining separate. To them, unity was not taking a stand against injustice but waiting quietly for justice to work itself out. Racial reconciliation won't happen if we just wait it out. We have to be intentional and willing to be uncomfortable at times if we want to see true change. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">4. Bridging cultural gaps won't happen overnight and won't always be comfortable but is possible. A few weeks ago, I sat in our church and wept as my pastor and our worship leader - both of whom are white - baptized a black man who was a friend of the worship leader and who had heard the gospel through that friendship. It struck me that this would have been shocking in my grandparent's generation and those that preceded it. Though our church doesn't yet fit the definition of multi-cultural (at least 20% of a church's members don't belong to the predominant racial group there) I have hope that change is coming. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">Today, it's my prayer that we take time to stop and look back long enough to remember where we came from and all that was defeated through the sacrifices of so many during the civil rights movement. I also pray that what we see causes us to gain motivation and a determination to continue moving forward especially in the context of church. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">I'll end this with the ending to King's letter: <i>"Let us all hope that the dark clouds of racial prejudice will soon pass away and the deep fog of misunderstanding will be lifted from our fear drenched communities, and in some not too distant tomorrow the radiant stars of love and brotherhood will shine over our great nation with all their scintillating beauty."</i></span>Emily Lassiter http://www.blogger.com/profile/09709282458155561066noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8834924846751328714.post-74072362496748026282014-01-08T19:16:00.000-08:002014-01-09T06:06:38.344-08:00Four Reasons I'm logging out and putting down my phone<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">As I started thinking through some things I wanted to do differently in the new year, I considered disconnecting from social media and my phone and being more intentional in engaging the people around me. I even wrote about resolving to do just that in my recent blog on motherhood (You can read more about it </span><a href="http://elassiter.blogspot.com/2013/12/confessions-and-resolutions-from.html"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">here</span></a><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">). However, making the change has proven harder than I thought.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">I continued to scroll, tweet and upload photos after feeling convicted to put boundaries in place. Earlier in the week I came across </span><a href="http://jarridwilson.com/why-im-getting-a-divorce-in-2014/"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">this</span></a><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"> blog post and today I saw the video below. Both of these were sobering reminders that I needed to make a change and led me to some introspection on why it had been so difficult to follow through. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">Don't get me wrong, I won't delete my accounts or disconnect my phone. These things aren't bad in and of themselves. </span><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">I've just come to the realization that there are some deeper reasons I've had trouble stepping away and these things need to be dealt with.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">Here are four reasons it's been hard to put my phone down and disconnect (and four reasons I really need to): </span><br />
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</span><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgWCtl3H4B8wc4xjjEWmDv9bb6byyOaizfEbkhlKEgZimYAjAmayuHIMDCNtCpqU6qeP_Vr8Q0B1OrPkEEpektKeFUM2OTTInxQc4v_1hwQz-WsVs7tSKdvJpKVTEat-xceiJqvMIWR_gk/s1600/cell+phone.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"></span></a><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">1. Social media can become an alternate reality - a way for us to seek approval, validation and inclusion. I realized I was horrified if someone would tag me in an unflattering photo, because I was always trying to paint myself in the best possible light to gain acceptance. This showed me that while I am fully loved and accepted by God, something in my heart couldn't believe it. I was seeking a counterfeit approval from people who didn't know me at all and likely had no desire to know me.</span> </div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">2. Disconnecting is an introvert's dream come true. Those who know me well know that I don't have much love for large groups. I like to fade into the background in social settings and find ways to avoid conversations with people I don't know. I learned that if I wanted to avoid beginning a conversation or the awkward silence that sometimes happens, I could disconnect by scrolling through social networking sites. </span><br />
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</span><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">3. Pictures can capture memories, but no one likes the paparazzi. I realized that I'm that annoying person who always has their phone out documenting every occasion to "capture memories" to share with social media. I would make my children stop what they were doing repeatedly to pose for photos. I would even coach them on what to do or retake photos if they didn't look their best. You know, teaching them to set up an alternate reality (just like Mom) or that they needed to look a certain way to be accepted. I also happened to accidentally delete all those photos and videos the other day which served as a good reminder that memories still exist after photos are gone and can be created outside of an SD card. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia;">4. Chris frequently refers to my phone as my "white husband."</span><span style="font-family: Georgia;"> It has been a common scenario for me to watch a movie with him or our children while scrolling through my Twitter or Facebook feed. I always tried to justify that they weren't attempting to engage me in a conversation when I did it. They were engrossed in a movie, after all. The reality is that it's rude and there were times when they were seeking my attention and I made them wait while I finished a text or email. I've been communicating to those closest to me that they're not important enough for my full attention and also set a terrible example for my children to follow. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia;">I'm learning that running away from issues doesn't solve them so I'm making the decision to be pro-active. I'm working through why it's so difficult for me to rest in God's full acceptance and approval of me. I'm not going to use my phone as an easy out in social situations and I'm </span><span style="font-family: Georgia;">putting it away while with family and friends. Maybe I'll take photos with a camera and work on just enjoying making memories without feeling like the whole world wants to know what I'm doing at that moment. You may not see me as much on social networking sites anymore, but I hope you understand why. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia;">I'd like to hear your thoughts on this issue. How do you wrestle with setting boundaries on social media and cell phones in order to best engage those around you? </span><br />
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<br />Emily Lassiter http://www.blogger.com/profile/09709282458155561066noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8834924846751328714.post-61162627045369915482013-12-31T10:50:00.000-08:002013-12-31T11:05:16.141-08:00Moving On: 3 thoughts on the new year<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> I'm really not sad to see 2013 go. If life had a reset button, I would have pushed it several times this year. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">I wasn't planning on adding to the many New Year's blogs already
circulating, but as I sat to compose my feelings it was more than I
could fit into a tweet (Who made the decision to limit Twitter to 140 characters anyway?). </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">The S.O. song "Lows and Highs" best sums up the last year of my life. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">The Lassiter family has had its share of lows and highs this year. From the publishing of Chris' first book and amazing trip to Bermuda to job loss and a situation where we could only weep and pray reminding ourselves of Exodus 14 (where God promises to fight for his people as they sit in silence).</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">For me personally, it was the year I made the choice to truly forgive the men who took the life of a friend and started the process of reconciliation by corresponding with them through mail. Tonight also marks 13 years since I walked away from my old life with no regrets. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">Here are three things I'm thinking about and praying through as I look to 2014:</span><br />
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<li><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><i><b>What have I learned through this year that I want to take with me into the next one? </b></i>We've seen God really fight for us this year as we faced situations that we couldn't handle on our own. In the Old Testament, God had his people set up memorials so they'd never forget all he'd done for them. On a day where I was losing hope, I came across a note card from the last time we were in a tough financial situation. I had written all the ways God had miraculously provided through people in our lives and it was a great reminder when I needed it most. While this has been a really tough year, we've also seen people come together to provide for our family in unbelievable ways. I think it's time to make another note card.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><i><b>Is there anyone else I need to forgive?</b></i> You can read more about my journey to forgiveness <a href="http://www.thecrosspromotion.blogspot.com/2013/11/when-real-enemy-is-inner-me-five.html">here</a>. This year, I understood more clearly the need to truly forgive and the consequences of refusing to do so. Unforgiveness is like locking yourself in a prison and arming yourself with a shank - ready to attack the people closest to you for what your offender did to you. We often believe the lie that our offender holds the key to our freedom, while in reality the key to our cell is in our possession all along. We just have to make the decision to use it. As I head into this next year, I'm praying for God to show me others I need to forgive to move into 2014 free and safer for those who love me. </span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><i><b>What am I doing with the new life I've been given? </b></i>I'll never forget that New Year's Eve service (back in 2000) where I heard about and accepted the offer of a second chance. As I reflect on Jesus giving his life for me, I'm asking myself if I really give my all for him. If I only have one shot at this earthly life, then I want it to count. I want to take every opportunity to point others to the hope that found me and to be intentional about making Jesus famous through the platform I've been given. I'm taking some time today to pray for more opportunities in 2014 to do just that. </span></li>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">I'd love to hear your thoughts on what I've written or some things that you're thinking through as we head into the new year. </span><br />
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<br />Emily Lassiter http://www.blogger.com/profile/09709282458155561066noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8834924846751328714.post-10609691365604187062013-12-27T07:51:00.003-08:002013-12-27T07:51:29.501-08:00Confessions and resolutions from an imperfect Mom. <span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">When my children were younger I had this idea that I had to be the perfect Mom. I saw other Moms who baked all their own bread, homeschooled their children and professed to have so much joy in parenting. I bet you know a mom like this, too. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">I tried my best to mimic what I saw, but the result was bitterness and frustration (which never earns you a Perfect Mother Award). I was a failure. The more I tried to force myself into the 'perfect Mom' mold, the more disheartened I became. I could never be one of those "perfect Moms." Guess what? You can't either. There's no such thing. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">I write this to Moms who are being crushed under the weight of their imperfections and failures. Yes, you are imperfect and will have days where you wonder why God even gave children to a broken person like you. We all do. Rest in the God who made you, knows the depths of your heart, loves you in spite of yourself and is famous for using broken, imperfect people to accomplish great things.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">Here are five things I've resolved to do in light of my imperfections as a Mom:</span><br />
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<li><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><b>Walk in humility before my kids.</b> A woman I know shared that one of the reasons she returned home
after a season of rebellion was because her parents always asked her
forgiveness when they were wrong. She knew they would welcome her with open arms in one of her darkest moments because they never implied that they were perfect themselves. This has always stuck with me and I've resolved to admit my failures to my children and ask for their forgiveness often. </span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><b>Engage my children rather than manage them.</b> My wise husband always says "rules without relationship equals rebellion." It's easier to parent our children by managing them rather than engaging them in relationship, but no one wants to be managed. Relationships are hard and take a lot of work, but we were made for relationships. I've resolved to be more proactive in engaging my children in relationships - getting to know them and allowing myself to be known by them. </span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><b>Live the gospel more than I talk about it. </b>As they say: "Real recognize real." I talk a lot about the gospel, but do I live out its implications in my own life in front of my family? I can tell you the answer and it's not 'yes'. My children will only learn to be good fakers if they see me talk about the gospel publicly without it being a reality in my private life.<b> </b>I'm resolving not to make excuses for parts of my life that don't line up with the gospel and to pray for change/growth in those areas. </span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><b>More Soul Train lines and laughter and less yelling and lecturing.</b> Yes, we really have a Soul Train line in our kitchen from time to time (Don't judge). Life is fleeting. This reality has become clearer now that I have a child in high school. If we're not careful we'll miss out on opportunities to just enjoy this life and the people in it. I resolve to be more intentional about creating memories and enjoying my children while I still have the chance. </span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><b>Leave the results to God. </b>Back when I was striving to be the perfect Mom, I had this false idea that my children would follow in my faith if I did everything right as their mother. I always heard "Train up a child in the way he should go and he will not depart from it," but never factored in the implications of free will. My children have the same freedom I did to choose Christ or to deny him and there is no such thing as parenting your children into the kingdom of Heaven. We're called to live out the gospel the best we can, cultivate loving relationships and leave the heart change to the Holy Spirit. I'm resolving to stop striving and to rest in God's work in the hearts of my children. </span></li>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">One of the most freeing books on motherhood I've ever read is <i>Christ in the Chaos </i>by Kimm Crandall.<i> </i>You can find it<i> </i><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Christ-Chaos-Gospel-Changes-Motherhood/dp/1936760703/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1388085181&sr=8-1&keywords=Christ+in+the+Chaos">here</a>. </span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">I'd love to hear your thoughts on these resolutions or motherhood in general. </span><br />
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Emily Lassiter http://www.blogger.com/profile/09709282458155561066noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8834924846751328714.post-56746094694730554172013-12-21T10:35:00.000-08:002013-12-21T19:38:24.870-08:00A plea to my American friends in the faith: Why Duck Dynasty should not be our main focus.<br />
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The same day the Duck Dynasty story began circulating on social media and major news networks, another story was shared that has been overshadowed by the Duck Dynasty craze. This was the headline: "Nearly 1,000 Killed Over 2 Days in Central African Republic." You can read more about it <a href="http://www.cnn.com/2013/12/18/world/africa/car-violence/index.html?hpt=wo_c2">here</a>.<br />
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Did you read that story? I probably wouldn't have if I didn't see a tweet about it from a young woman I know who is there. As days have passed, I see many of my friends in the faith outraged and taking a stand against the suspension of Phil Robertson. Today, I saw petitions were circulating and faith-based groups were calling for boycotts. Yet, I have hardly seen any posts or calls for action over the murders of nearly 1,000 people made in the image of our God.<br />
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This post is a plea to the American church to wake up to what's
happening outside of our American Christian bubble. I hope this will not
feel like an attack, but more a call for change from someone with a heart just like yours. Believe me, I know what it is to wrestle with a Christian worldview that is filtered through American lenses. We are born with a nature that instinctively turns inward and honestly it's easier to fight for things that affect us directly.<br />
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I pray we as a church would begin to view the world through God's eyes and not just our own. I pray our hearts would break for the things that break God's heart and not just our own (Even if those issues push against what many of our friends in the faith believe or focus on). I pray we would not be side-tracked by trivial things that will not affect our eternity or that of others. In the end, that's all that really matters in this world that's not our home. <br />
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Emily Lassiter http://www.blogger.com/profile/09709282458155561066noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8834924846751328714.post-29945468113015497432013-12-20T07:54:00.001-08:002013-12-28T17:22:40.062-08:00Three Reasons I Started My Own Blog<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">My husband, who is an amazing writer, has been pushing me to start a blog. Here are three reasons I've decided to take his advice:</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">1. He tells me writing is therapeutic. After my last guest post on his blog I have to say I agree. If you haven't read that, you can find it <a href="http://thecrosspromotion.blogspot.com/2013/11/when-real-enemy-is-inner-me-five.html">here</a>. For years, I have wrestled with the feelings I've had about the tragic loss of a friend. Writing about it was freeing for me and has helped me take steps in moving forward on my journey to forgive and heal. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">2. I'm sure it's also a good idea for me to have a creative outlet for the thoughts that keep me up at night. My first guest post on my husband's blog was about justice. If you haven't read it, you can find it <a href="http://thecrosspromotion.blogspot.com/2013/10/guest-post-from-my-wife-emily-lassiter.html">here</a>. As God has allowed me to step into the lives of people in our community, it's been hard for me to process the stories of abuse and injustice I've heard. Hopefully, this will be a way for me to use my voice to expose some of the issues of injustice I've encountered and to be part of the solution to those issues. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">3. Finally, I wanted to start blogging to give my social media friends a break from my ranting. I'm sure people would rather see cute photos of our family and ministry updates than my opinions on what's wrong with the world and my pleas for more people to use their lives for change. Friends, this is as much for you as it is for me. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">Hopefully this blog will do all three. I'd love to hear your input along the way and hope this blog will be thought-provoking, encouraging and maybe it'll be a platform for me to make what's left of my life count.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">So it begins. </span><br />
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<i><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">Emily Lassiter is married to Chris Lassiter (You can find his blog <a href="http://thecrosspromotion.blogspot.com/">here</a>) and together they have 5 amazing children. She is an area Coordinator for YoungLives, an outreach ministry to teenage mothers through Young Life. Please consider following the Word Redemption blog (by clicking 'Join This Site'), which will be updated weekly. </span></i>Emily Lassiter http://www.blogger.com/profile/09709282458155561066noreply@blogger.com0